The blogs are becoming fewer and farther between. All I see is a white screen and if I squint, I can kind of make out the words. Friends have told me that it wasn't this bad for them. Guess I'm just lucky. Either that, or I always took my outstanding vision for granted and thus am finding it more challenging to see now.
I am beginning to notice things. It's amazing how often people say, "Look at this." or "Did you see that?" or "Watch and I'll show you how....." and so on I never know or see what they're talking about but I quietly nod my head in agreement. I often wonder if this is what it's like for some children in school when they just don't understand something. There's a definite level of defeat and lowering of one's self worth.
There's a word that has rarely been used when referring to me. This isn't vanity or bragging and I didn't say never, just rarely, This week when I was standing in Costco squinting at something on a shelf in an effort to see it, someone said, " rude....rudeness". I turned to look and discovered a woman who was nodding her head and glancing at me. I have no idea what it was all about. I was briefly upset before I realized that this stranger knows nothing about me or my circumstance. The way I see it, she was the one being rude.
So, early this past week, I received a call left on the answering machine that surgery was being scheduled for January to March. "Call us back so that we might schedule you" was the message. I panicked hoping to get the earliest possible dates. I called back. In fact, over the course of the next three days, I phoned more than twenty times. All I got was an answering machine. I finally left a message early Thursday morning suggesting someone return my call since I'd be staying home all day. No calls.
Friday morning, I dared to leave the house. Of course, when I got home, there was a message saying I should call them back prior to their closing time at noon,. The message had been recorded five minutes after I left the house. It was now twelve forty five. More frustration.
We actually planned to drive to the office seventy kilometres away on Monday morning if I didn't get a response by phoning. I called when they opened and heard a real voice. "I'll call you back after I clear the crowd that's checking in" the receptionist promised. She did. I now have my hospital appointments for January.
My next office visit will be in December when I get measured for eye inserts....lenses or whatever gets put in there with a tiny straw like implement for future better vision. I hope I'll still be able to see enough to write part 5 of this continuing experience.