Sunday, May 29, 2011

Fashion Fools

I enjoy dressing up and looking nice. I like to watch shows about styles and I like to have knowledge of the latest in fashion. I am not a trendsetter nor am I interested in being one. I thank my parents for that. Although I grew up in the era of Ben Casey shirts and Dr. Kildare blouses, colourful cardigans worn backwards and kilts with giant safety pins, I owned none of these items. Mom would say, "Why would you want to look like everyone else?" and dad added, "Waste of money, they won't be wearing those stupid shirts next year."  Both were correct. Besides that, they pointed out that Germans don't need kilts.

Perhaps it was my 35 cent an hour babysitting income that convinced me not to argue. I prefer to think that I was being mature and sensible. Oh, who am I trying to kid? The population of young girls began demonstrating their preference for one or the other of these hot young t.v. doctors by wearing the appropriate shirt. I became increasingly envious. This was my generation's version of the current vampire movie, Jacob or Edward fan alliances. As for the skirts, I can't say I really cared. I was just very attracted to the giant kilt pins and I still am.

As a teen, I memorized the women's clothing section in the Eaton's catalogue which arrived at our door each season. I was like the small child who pores over the "Christmas Wish Book" except that instead of toys, I would select clothing and accessories, saying to myself, "I'm going to get this and I'm going to get that." What I got were homemade sweaters that either my mom or I knit, and an occasional new skirt or party dress. As I became older, a family friend came to the rescue. She enjoyed sewing and created some more fashionable blouses, jumpers, dresses and a most magnificent, skating skirt lined with shiny green sateen. I felt like a superstar as I skated up and down the creek behind our house spinning and swirling.

Just as trends didn't make sense then, some don't make sense now. For example, I think that if the words "spectacular", "stupendous" or  "magnificent" fit across your butt, you probably shouldn't be wearing the pants with those words on them. It reminds me of a tractor trailer I saw recently with the words "wide load" on the back.

The sporting of pajamas in public also has me mystified. Are these the same pjs that have been worn for sleep? Do people go out in public and then wear that germ infested nightwear back to bed?  Do they have a collection of pajama pants which they put on just for going to the shopping mall or other really special occasions?

Of particular concern and relevance to me has been an ongoing trend, women's shirts with stripes. Why are the lines always horizontal? They not only make a person look twice their size, but depending on the kind and location of said stripes, they stretch and get distorted across portions of the female anatomy.

Recently, I saw the latest in summer fashion. It consisted of a long sleeved blazer type jacket, a long sleeved shirt, a scarf, shorts and a pair of high heeled shoes. Basically, a suit with shorts. Cute, but how does this make any sense? If it's hot in the summer, who wants to wear a jacket, long sleeves and high heels? If it's cold enough for a blazer, who's going to want to wear shorts with bare legs?  Is the added scarf meant to keep the legs warm? I suppose that some women will be sporting this style just to be part of the newest craze. Perhaps it'll even be the same ones who are currently walking around with "astounding" written on their back sides.

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