Sunday, June 12, 2016

Thank You. That's All I Need to Say or Hear.

As I sit here writing a thank you card, I have to wonder how many people actually still do this on a regular basis. This particular card is not for any kind of a celebratory present, although I certainly consider his efforts a gift. It's for someone deserving who has been extremely helpful to me over the past six months, going above and beyond his basic job description. After all, we all like to be recognized and know that we're appreciated don't we?

I'm not saying that people can't forget, or that occasionally, there might be an oversight when it comes to thank you responses. It just doesn't seem the same as it once was.

I recently found notes my children wrote to their grandparents thanking them for a variety of reasons....grandma's delicious capon, a shared experience, a gift. I taught them from young on to be grateful. The number of times they still do this in the form of a card or note is probably much more limited these days. What I do know is that they at least know how to say the words, "Thank you." Whether it's in person, on social media, in an email, or texting, they say, "Thank you."

One thing specificlly that occurred to me is how weddings have changed over the years.  I'm not saying there's anything wrong with how they've changed, they're just different in so many ways.

At one time, people would receive an invitation, respond whether they could attend or not using the little pre-stamped card inside, purchase and wrap a gift, dress up nicely, attend the wedding. The first thing after the bride and groom would do after all the festivities ended, was write a little note of thanks to everyone. Sometimes, it would take up to a month if they waited for a photo or specialty card from the overpriced photographer. I've read in Miss Etiquette that up to a year is even acceptable.

Not so anymore. I speak from experience when I say that this has changed a lot. First, a "save the date" notice arrives. Later, there's an invitation in some form or other. Often there's some kind of online information which gives you details of the wedding, the venue, the ability to respond as to whether you're coming, and what to buy from the happy couple's wish list. There are pages of merchandise, prices, and stores for your online shopping and shipping convenience.  In fact, you can purchase the item, have it sent to them, and never find out if it arrived.

Gone are the days of tirelessly handwriting thank you cards, with or without a photo of the bride and groom. Gone are the days of carefully selecting and wrapping gifts. Gone are the days of acknowledgment as to whether the present has been received. Gone too are the thank yous, either written or verbal.  Not gone however, is the credit card receipt for payment of said gift, which we can only hope got to its intended location.

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